Today James is having his facial and sinus bones set. They are not going to mess w his eye today but they are extubating him (mouth breathing tubes) and giving him a tracheotomy. This will prevent damaging his tongue/ throat from the intubation. Also it will make him seem less equipment-y for the kids who want to see pics of him. However, they're going to shave his head and face to access his bones so he'll have more bandages. Tomorrow is wake-up day!! (terror and joy and HOLDING ON TO THE PROMISES)I was making my coffee when I looked at the clock and saw that it was 7:57. I totally freaked out and ran out the door- I was supposed to rendezvous with my handler (Michelle) and a friend, Corinne, (ok, Michelle is a FRIEND too) at a Sprouts grocery store at 8!!
I got there and they text me, "aren't we meeting at 8:30?"
Of course. Big day of surgery for James and God made sure I would have half an hour with Him before, even if He tricked me into it. So, I read:
Ephesians 3:20-21 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen!
2 Corinthians 4:7 But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.
This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him.
and of course my plea, Matthew 9:24, "...and straightaway the father of the child cried out and said with tears, "Lord, I believe, help my unbelief!"
Finally, at 12:40 (two hours "late" in the real world but fine for "hospital time") James went back into surgery with the plastic surgeon to fix the 14 broken facial bones. His beard had been shaved off last night, I haven't seen his naked chin since basic training in 1999.
We settled in the waiting room, me and three girl friends. The DR said it would be 6-10 hours... but no. He shows up right as our pastor shows up and said the surgery is cancelled for the day, the week. He was drawing the lines to make the incisions on and James lost oxygen saturation and they couldn't regain it, so, no long surgery for James today.
What this means for me, is lots of talking and puzzling with the DRs and RNs trying to figure out why, what, etc. They start talking about tracheotomies and feeding tubes into his stomach. It hits me that we are going to be in the ICU for much, much longer than I thought. I know, I knew, that there is no "schedule" persay, but that everything depends on James and his body and his reactions to all the shocks to his system. I began to think that all the complications of a hospital stay- infections, pneumonia, sepsis... these were all going to become risks for James. Somehow it didn't occur to me that having multiple broken bones would include 6-8+ weeks on a ventilator and feeding tube.
I broke down (again, I think that makes 4 or 5 times now) and finally left to go feed Joseph. Brackenridge has mandatory close-down, no family/visitors every day from 6:30-8:30 am and pm. This forces me out the door. I got home and got in a yelling match with my mom and made Jackson cry. I got in bed and looked at my phone, aaaJames is my first contact in it. I just wanted to push the button and call James and tell him all about my crappy day. I wanted him to come home and cook for me, for me to sit on the bar stool and talk to him while he sauteed and stirred and chopped and seasoned.